Tech Worker Finds Job Tolerable Enough to Keep Showing Up

Employee Cites Adequate Natural Light, Manageable Workload

AMSTERDAM — Software developer Daniel Morita, 34, confirmed Monday that he has found his position at Vanguard Digital sufficiently bearable to justify his continued presence at the office, now entering its fifth consecutive year.

"It's fine," said Morita, shrugging in a manner colleagues described as neither enthusiastic nor despairing. "The chair doesn't hurt my back anymore. I figured out how to adjust it in 2022."

Morita, who reportedly experiences emotions ranging from "okay" to "not bad" during his 40-hour workweek, explained that several factors have contributed to his decision to remain employed at the mid-sized software consultancy. He cited the natural light from the windows near his desk. He also noted that his manager mostly leaves him alone.

"Some days I even look forward to lunch," he added.

Coworkers confirmed that Morita has achieved a state of professional equilibrium rarely seen in the modern workforce. He does not love or hate his job. He simply does his job, then goes home, then returns the following day to do it again.

"Daniel's really found his groove," said team lead Sandra Hutchins. "He never complains. He never suggests improvements. He just commits code and refills his water bottle. It's actually kind of inspiring."

Human resources records indicate Morita has not applied for a promotion, requested a transfer, or updated his LinkedIn profile since his initial hiring in November 2020. His annual performance reviews consistently note that he meets expectations, a designation Morita said he finds to be accurate.

When asked about his long-term career aspirations, Morita stared at a point slightly above the interviewer's head for several seconds before responding. "I guess I'll see how it goes," he said.

At press time, Morita was seen eating a sandwich at his desk while staring at a block of code with an expression witnesses described as neutral. ■